So, I’ve kind of developed this survival mode, you know? An attitude to stay afloat in a sea of negativity. Growing up in a not-so-great place, where putting others down was the norm, I just sort of blended in. They labeled me as ‘EXTRA,’ and I ended up toning down who I really was.

The people I cared about managed to dim my light, mostly because I let them. I was so busy caring about them that I forgot about myself. And that reflected in my weight — 252 pounds or 114 kilograms at the age of 12. The constant negativity made me believe I wasn’t worthy of love or being smart (although I totally proved my mom wrong!).

Then came a turning point — I packed my bags and took off to Mexico, leaving everyone and everything behind. Not that everyone was bad; it’s just that I’d gotten used to giving attention to the toxic ones. Even after leaving, I struggled to figure out who I really am. Every time I tried to spread my wings, doubt crept in, and I lost faith in myself.

At the end of 2019, I hit a point where I was just done with people. I stopped caring about what people think, though I still care a lot about people. I guess I’ve become too old and tired for that nonsense.

Now, I’m on a mission to be the person I want to be — loving, caring, silly, funny, and full of energy. I want to build a better world through technology. I used to live in the past or the future, never really in the now. But that’s changing. I’ve found some amazing, like-minded folks who keep me rooted in the present.

I could probably write a whole book about my life, but here’s the point: Love yourself first. Find people who get you, whether in real life or on the internet. Life’s short, so it’s time to chase your dreams and love yourself most of all. It’s not selfish; it’s what gives you the power to love others even harder. Because really, how can you love anyone if you can’t love yourself first?